Recently reported in the Massachusetts Bar Association Lawyers Journal,
the following are questions actually asked by attorneys during trials
and, in certain cases, the responses given by insightful witnesses:
1. Q: "Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he
doesn't know about it until the next morning?"
2. Q: "The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?"
3. Q: "Were you present when your picture was taken?"
4. Q: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a
pulse?"
A: "No."
Q: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
A: "No."
Q: "Did you check for breathing?"
A: "No."
Q: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when
you began the autopsy?"
A: "No."
Q: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
A: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
Q: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
A: "It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law
somewhere."
5. Q: "Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?"
6. Q: "Did he kill you?"
7. Q: "How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?"
8. Q: "You were there until the time you left, is that true?"
9. Q: "How many times have you committed suicide?"
10. Q: "So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And what were you doing at that time?"
11. Q: "She had three children, right?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "How many were boys?"
A: "None."
Q: "Were there any girls?"
12. Q: "You say the stairs went down to the basement?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"
13. Q: "Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn't
you?"
A: "I went to Europe, Sir."
Q: "And you took your new wife?"
14. Q: "How was your first marriage terminated?"
A: "By death."
Q: "And by who's death was it terminated?"
15. Q: "Can you describe the individual?"
A: "He was about medium height and had a beard."
Q: "Was this a male, or a female?"
16. Q: "Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition
notice which I sent to your attorney?"
A: "No, this is how I dress when I go to work."
17. Q: "Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?"
A: "All my autopsies are performed on dead people."
18. Q: "All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?"
A: "Oral."
19. Q: "Do you recall the time that you examined the body?"
A: "The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.."
Q: "And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?"
A: "No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was
doing an autopsy."
20. Q: "You were not shot in the fracas?"
A: "No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel."
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Last Modified: Thursday, 24-Jan-2008 08:06:34 EST |
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